If you were faced with Him in all His glory

What would you ask if you had just one question?

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IC contact: Sirenspull
- your calls are bad news
Uh, hi! This is Ca- I mean Chuck Shurley, just- Chuck, sorry. [Indistinct fumbling noises] Leave a message after the beep and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks?

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You're always drunk. I'd buy it if you told me you were too sober.

Now get your ass out here.

No I'm not. Just this week.

[He pauses for a second.]

The place isn't you-proofed. You know that, dude. I know you do.

[But fine jeez he's walking down the stupid dumb stairs anyway. You jerk.]

This ain't a conversation for an audience, Chuckie.

...This is gonna suck, isn't it?


[He hangs up on the angel- yeah, that's the kind of mood he's in - and is outside the house in less than two minutes. Waiting, basically. So what if he's angelproofed and Gabriel can't actually tell if he's outside unless he's there. Tough.]

Away from the damn house.

Gabriel, I'm outside the damn house. Jeez, can't you just kidnap me like a normal angel?

[And here's Gabriel.]

Well, since it's not really kidnapping if it's consensual... [He claps a hand on his shoulder and they're magically at the spot where they brought Lucifer after Aslan healed him.]

What the fuck is your damage, Heather?

Right now my damage is you.

[Shrugging his arm off roughly and stalking away until there's enough personal space for his health and comfort.]

[Watching him warily] And Lucifer's just the side order, right?

[Chuck whips around sharply and gives him a dirty look.]

Look, whatever you're pissed about, why don't you just cut to that?

You're acting like he stabbed him in the friggin' heart, jackass.

[Chuck takes a biiiiig step back and turns away again, plunking down on the rocks to stare out at the ocean.]

I'm not acting like anything.

[He hasn't talked to any angels on purpose since he pissed all over Lucifer's Cheerios.]

Then explain to me what in Dante's fucking Inferno is going on?

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